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Carrboro Town Board Green with Envy! Chapel Hill board Approves Single Twin Tower Building Project!

The proposed Single Twin Towers will tower over the proposed Weaver Street Wall

The building war continues..... Chapel Hill has the University of North Carolina... so Carrboro recruited CHCLE.(Slight advantage Chapel Hill)Chapel Hill has the University Power Plant... so Carrboro built a cement factory(advantage Chapel Hill). Carrboro built Weaver Street Chapel Hill built Whole Foods and Earthfare(advantage Chapel Hill).... Chapel Hill built enough houses to house 50,000+ residents, Carrboro built Roberson Place(advantage Chapel Hill).

Tired of being looked upon as the little sister of Chapel Hill or even worse, Chapel Hill's bedroom community, Carrboro decided to put an end to the building race once and for all. Chapel Hill could build the Franklin Street Hotel(article coming soon), if they wanted, but the new project Carrboro had in store would dwarf the Franklin Street Hotel.

The Art Center Hotel complex would be a massive tangle of buildings housing shops, offices, The Arts Center, galleries and even people temporarily(Hotel) and semi-permanently(Apartments/Condos).

But no sooner had the ink dried on the plans for this historic project, Chapel Hill came up with it's trump card! The Chapel Hill World Trade Center. A massive project consisting of not one, but two skyscrapers(of which only one will be built). With a capacity of 50,000 people the whole town of Chapel Hill will be able to move into the building upon completion

The project, from the onset, has been surrounded by controversy. Some residents of Carrboro believe that 110 stories is just too high for a project that is virtually on the Town of Carrboro Town line(the building will butt up against the Carrboro Passport Control office building which handles immigration of CH refugees looking to escape Chapel Hill and move to Carrboro, as well as customs for the massive amounts of UNC souvenir trinkets flooding The Carrboro market- Go Heels!). Others are concerned that the buildings will cast shadows on 60% of Carrboro from 10am-130pm and if the second tower is built from 3-530pm, in effect lowering the yearly average temperature of Carrboro approximately 15 degrees F.

Another concern is the loss of privacy. From the 25th floor upwards each occupant will have a birds eye view of all yards in Carrboro within 4 miles. Should Carrboro decide to house a satellite Police Station on any of those floors that will be the end of Carrboro's budding backyard Weed industry, the naked backyard Yoga studios, and the high school(and underage University) student backyard keg parties that keep the mini-marts flourishing. On the positive side, with 50,000 residents so close, with a pair of binoculars, our peeping Toms are sure to find at least one person who forgets to close their blinds, freeing Carrboro residents to walk around naked and engage in acts of extreme affection with their blinds up without fear of being seen.

With all the controversy surrounding the Tower(s), there has recently been talk of scaling it down to only 10 stories. With that news, Carrboro gave a united sigh of relief, "Wow, that's great!", exclaimed one resident, "only 10 stories! Chapel Hill/Carrboro will retain it's small village image".

The Town Board was also elated. "We commend The Chapel Hill Board for their use of discretion. They have every right to build 100 stories, but have decided to err on the side of caution and to help keep Carrboro/Chapel Hill quaint.

But The Carrboro News has uncovered other reasons for the Carrboro Boards elation..... An 11 story building will be a lot easier to fund and pass building codes than a 111 story building, not to mention the employment opportunities for the board members and their families should a controversial building project need some extra smoothing over in the community.(Was this change of plans a deliberate act on the part of Chapel Hill to keep the Building Race going? Like the demise of the Great Soviet Union, the prospect of winning the war with Carrboro would force Chapel Hill to have to look for other enemies..... and Durham, the closest town is way ahead in the building war raising the eternally comtemplated question- "Is it better to be a whale in a pail or a minnow in an ocean?)

And contrary to our beliefs, there is a loser..... and a very dejected loser at that. WCOM, slated to move it's headquarters to the 110th floor and transmit from the radio tower saw it's destiny as the #1 Community Radio Station in North Carolina fade and visions of transmitting as far away as Dodson's Crossroads were retired into their Year 2050 projections.

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