A duck walks into
a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.
The barman looks
at him and says, 'Hang on! You're a duck.'
'I see your eyes
are working,' replies the duck.
'And you can talk!'
exclaims the barman.
'I see your ears
are working, too,' says the duck. 'Now if you don't mind,
can I have my beer and my sandwich please?'
about that,' says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint.
'It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What are you
doing round this way?'
'I'm working on
the building site across the road,' explains the duck. 'I'm
barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more, but
takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from his
bag and proceeds to read it.
So, the duck reads
his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman
good day and leaves.
The same thing
happens for two weeks.
Then one day the
circus comes to town.
comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him 'You're
with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could
be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats
sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!'
says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. 'Get
him to give me a call.'
So the next day
when the duck comes into the pub the barman says, 'Hey Mr.
Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really
'I'm always looking
for the next job,' says the duck. 'Where is it?'
'At the circus,'
says the barman.
'The circus?' repeats
replies the barman.
'The circus?' the
duck asks again. 'That place with the big tent?'
'Yeah,' the barman
'With all the animals
who live in cages, and performers who live in caravans?' says
'Of course,' the
'And the tent has
canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?'
persists the duck.
says the barman.
The duck shakes
his head in amazement, and says .. .
'What the f***
would they want with a plasterer??!'
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