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Loitering Easter Bunny Arrested with 10 Children at Carr Mill Mall!

Some folks think the Carr Mill Mall rules go too far while others think that they don't go far enough, but ask the Easter Bunny and he will side with the former. After being arrested on Saturday and spending 4 days in the Orange County Jail locked in a 10 x 10 cell with 10 screaming kids he's ready to ditch his eggs and grab a sign. "Who would have thought that I was breaking the law? All I did was hang out on the lawn with the kids and pass out Easter Eggs!"

And that was the problem. The Carr Mill Mall states unequivocally that there is to be no loitering and to the best of our knowledge we did not see the disclaimer "unless you are the Easter Bunny".

"We don't care if you're the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus or Jesus Christ, you can't loiter here!" explained one unnamed employee.

The Easter Bunny seemed to be flaunting the rules and with each step he took, his appearance of challenging the rules became more obvious. Dressed up like a bunny was a sure attention getter, and not acceptable behavior at Carr Mill Mall. We must all blend in and not bring attention to ourselves is the unwritten Carr Mill Motto. We must all chant in metered unity "We're individuals, we live in a unique town and we are all part of this accepting liberal community!". Easter Bunny breaks rule number one.

A large gathering of people...ah oh.... two people are not allowed to dance, but the Easter Bunny thought he could get away with attracting a group of 10-15 children.... Easter Bunny breaks rule number two....

Passing out Easter Eggs....ah oh.... The Easter Bunny should know better than that- You are not allowed to pass out anything... literature, free samples, a hat or Easter Eggs.... Easter Bunny breaks rule number three....

And the third rule break was the break that broke the camel's back..... and in a moment's notice Easter Bunny and the kids were rounded up, put in the paddy wagon and shipped off to Hillsborough.

Upon the arrival of the Easter Bunny at the Jail all pandemonium broke out. "Man, I can't believe the Easter Bunny been holed up here with us", one inmate told The Carrboro News. "My pastor told me that I was going to have to meet The Lord in prison to straighten myself out, but who would have thought I would meet the Easter Bunny instead. I think The Lord must have sent the Easter Bunny because I wasn't quite ready!"

While in Jail the Easter Bunny performed a minor miracle.... he fed a jail full of 50 men with 3 hard boiled eggs and turned the putrid jailhouse water into wine.

And so, what could have been a disastrous public relations fiasco at Carr Mill Mall turned into a heartwarming Easter Story that will fill the hearts of many a man for many a year to come. The Lord works in mysterious ways!


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