Weaver Street Market to Expand.... Targets Super Target!

Every good businessman knows that diversity is the key to success. Every good business man knows that a one trick pony cannot entice the public forever and every good businessman knows that Super Target is racking up obscene profits with it's new "sell 'em anything you can for as cheap as you can" Policy(For those of you who love acronyms- STAYCFACAYC- pronounced StacyFakaYac.

Weaver Street Market, fresh off it's successful campaign to drive Earthfare out of Chapel Hill has set it's sites on the next Target- the Super Target.

"We've done it once, we can do it again", one manager explained to The Carrboro News. "We have an extremely loyal membership and if we can provide them with the lowest prices and convenient shopping they will come to us first! Unlike the conventional advertising model that relies on getting clients into the store to purchase a cheap protect and snagging them with the more expensive, we just want to get the members in the store the first time, and then they're sure to come back again."

"We've pretty much maxed out on the food membership potential(FMP) so we need to diversify to other areas. After doing a careful market analysis we have discovered that the three hottest areas in the retail market are electronics, baskets and vases!"

Weaver Street Market is betting that it's expansion in electronics, baskets and vases will help solidify it's position as the leader of the Carrboro Health Food Co-op Association. "Right now we're hovering around 100% of the market that shops in Carrboro Health Food Stores, but we hope that with a rather large investment we'll be able to increase our hold on the market."

With it's massive collection of vases, only second to the Thrift Shop, Weaver Street Market hopes to double it's revenue from Flower Sales. Unable to answer the philosophical question that has been debated for centuries "What came first, the flowers or the vases?", Weaver Street Market, in a show of market savvy responds "Who gives a shit.... we offer both!"

With the flower & vase market exploding, Weaver Street Market took it's profits and invested them into the Electronic business instead of giving the profits back to the members. True to it's motto "Give the profits to the members once and you have no money left over, invest the profits in the business and you'll have more profits to invest in the business!", Weaver Street Market embarked on it's bold new marketing plan.

"That'll be $1.36 for the mushrooms, $2.21 for the basil and $1,796.86 for the computer" Purchasing a computer can be a daunting and exhausting job. Weaver Street Market has devised a more relaxing way.... Pick out a couple of mushrooms and some loose basil and then your computer. Editor's Note: They are specializing in the sale of wires but still have a lot of space to expand the lines.

With phase 2 firmly in place there was only one more area that need to be put in place to complete the bold new triumvirate of sales. The Baskets.... "We recognized a long time ago that there was a huge market for baskets. Have you ever gone to the thrift shop? They have more baskets than any other type of thing for the home. When we saw that, we new that our future was in baskets! With our new program in place we have sold a massive amount of baskets.... People were coming in and purchasing 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6 baskets at a time.... we couldn't bag the baskets nearly as quickly as we could sell them. So once again we came up with a bold new marketing plan... The Basket Case. With 6 baskets in a case, and cases moving out at an uncanny speed, we are proud to be know as "Weaver Street Market- The Home of the Basket Case".

Just a few of the millions of baskets sitting atop the fruit bins... mixing and matching just 6 of these babies will help you create your own basket case.